New PDF release: Embracing Your Father: How to Build the Relationship You

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Additional info for Embracing Your Father: How to Build the Relationship You Always Wanted with Your Dad

Sample text

1 This is so because money stirs up all kinds of feelings—jealousy, resentment, rivalry, insecurity, shame, guilt, appreciation, love, joy, and obligation. In most relationships, money also represents power—who has the most of it, what they do with it, and how others react to it. ” So let’s see how money and work have played a part in your father-daughter relationship. 19 Copyright © 2004 by Linda Nielsen. Click here for terms of use. 20 EMBRACING YOUR FATHER Your Family’s Beliefs I know we’ve been over this already, but it’s worth repeating: What you and your father have been taught to believe about fathers and daughters has a big impact on how you treat each other and what you expect from each other—even when the beliefs you started with are not true.

Besides, I can’t remember dad doing anything loving for me while I was growing up except taking me to Disneyland once. ” Initially not a single memory of her father was positive, whereas her memories of her mom were overwhelmingly positive. I also noticed the extreme words she used to describe events: never, always, 100 percent, completely. In her memory, her dad was the powerful villain—and everyone else was a powerless victim. As I talked to Robin over the next few months, I worded my questions in ways that might help her to recall something good about her dad.

Overall, what kind of person did you think he was based on how he acted when he got home? The second mistake we make is assuming that the way our father behaves at work is the way he’s going to behave toward us. For example, if his job requires him to act extremely confident, competitive, outspoken, and decisive, you might assume that he isn’t capable of being vulnerable, emotional, confused, or humble around you. Or the kind of work he did while you were growing up may have led you to believe that he couldn’t be very insightful, communicative, sensitive, or tender with you.

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